Among things that have happened in life, nothing is more moving than memories from childhood. The earliest part of our life that drives us forward. Clips of moments that play in silent inside our head as we turns into adult.
These were moments when we visit father during his master study in the Great Britain in 1995. It was summer in London and it was beautiful. We saw street carnivals, the raising Tower Bridge, the infamous Big Ben, and a lot of museums. Despite the trip was short, none of us (me and my sisters perhaps) would realize these moments gave so much foundations for what we do later in our 20s and 30s.
August 2016 – I encountered a life crossroad with options that might be considered as “it is now or never” choices. Picking one of two alternatives that would alter to totally different realm between them. But the most important thing I realized was I knew which direction I would go. It was not the choosing that uneasy, but the people closest to us. At the end of these equally pleasant choices, I decided to progress with the one that I had been craving for.
After several years, I look back to that dilemma. It was a selfish choice, particularly for the closest people around me and I admitted it. One thing I knew for sure at that time, it was hard to see myself longing to go to the places where I’ve spent a part of my childhood there. It took more than a courage and a leap of faith to re-visit all those memories without ever having the chance to tell her in person, “Mom, I did it“.
It was personal. It always be personal.
After you kids came along, your mom, she said something to me I never quite understood. She said, “Now, we’re just here to be memories for our kids.”
I think now I understand what she meant.
Once you’re a parent, you’re the ghost of your children’s future.
– Interstellar (2014)